Loss can hit you when you least expect it. It can be the loss of a person, pet or thing. Each of us handles grief differently. There is no timetable to handling it. Some people take years to get over it. Many never do. What’s important is that you consider a Plan B when it happens.
Recently, I saw some unusual behaviors from a neighbor who lives across the street. I noticed that she wasn’t using her car on a daily basis. Some days, the car just sat there. This was apparent with the parking tickets that gradually appeared on her windshield. At first, they appeared monthly, then 2x a month, then every week. Those tickets are costly. They run 35 bucks each. If they are not paid by the due date, there is a 15 dollar penalty. Now the ticket is 50 bucks!
The other day, I caught her going to work. I asked her how things were going. Initially, she said things were going well. Then, there was a pause. She revealed that she just had a miscarriage. They were “trying” for a while. This loss devastated her and her husband. When she asked me why I asked about her. I told her that it was hard to miss the tickets that accumulated on her windshield. She was so grief stricken that she thought, “Fuck it. I don’t care about the tickets.” Her grief was so painful that the tickets were not that important. She continues to pay them (and the penalties), because she is so sad over the loss.
When you are IN grief, you can’t think straight. Your thoughts are jumbled. Getting dressed, or going to the bathroom is a MAJOR deal. If you don’t handle the grief, it goes DEEP and affects your body (not to mention your spirit). Your body starts to break down. You eventually develop illnesses that can’t be helped with conventional medicine or surgery.
If you recognize that you are not yourself and pursue counseling (or a support group), you NOW have a viable option. That option helps you break out of the sadness and gives you a chance to navigate life and its choices.
Plan B’s are GOOD. Think about them the next time you are experiencing LOSS.
Just 1 Page . . .
Focus: Grief, Resolution, Counseling, Spirit
Questions for you: 1) What’s got you stuck? 2) What steps can you take to move forward?