Don’t ask stupid questions!
I heard that recently in church. A wife said that to her husband. I saw the effect that type of verbal abuse had on both of them – DEVASTATING.
The wife looked angry. The husband looked beaten down. I couldn’t help but think what they looked like “pre-marriage.”
In a way, they looked like my parents. In our home my mom was an “alpha-male” – calling ALL the shots, making ALL the decisions. My dad was emasculated every day. I never saw him argue or challenge her. I can’t imagine living in that oppressive environment for 18 years. Yet, they both did! Both of them were unfulfilled. Not a good example of LOVE or respect.
In counseling, I explored the idea of dating and sharing my life with someone. As a product of my parent’s divorce, I’m apprehensive in getting to know someone in a way that goes beyond sex. The sex part is something I know. I also know myself and the baggage I bring. That baggage carries a DEEP wound. I know that’s the case with the woman I am with. I don’t know whether our baggage can withstand a healthy relationship. I guess I won’t know that until I jump in and find out.
Just 1 Page . . .
Focus: Dating, Intimacy, Spirit
Questions for you: 1) What baggage (drugs, alcohol, bi-polar) are deal breakers for you? 2) What baggage prevents your self-disclosure/intimacy with others?