Wednesday, May 31, 2017

Active Listening

Active  listening is the bridge to good communication. It is committed listening based on good habits and self control. Good listening is purposeful and productive because it allows the listener and the speaker to reach an understanding.

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Wednesday, May 24, 2017

The Importance Of Validation

I met Diane at a seminar on downsizing. A number of us “seniors” were there to get a handle on downsizing our homes and all its clutter. After the presentation, the marketing director asked us if we wanted to see some of the properties in this senior residence. Diane and I were the only 2 who jumped in for a “look see!”

As we entered the elevator, Diane spoke about herself and her journey. She was 74. She had two grown children. Her husband had been gravely ill for most of their marriage. When her daughter married out of state, her dad couldn’t attend because of his health. In addition, Diane had lost two businesses as a result of the economy. In addition, she took a fall which warranted a rod in her spine to keep her upright. It took her over a year to heal.
I was humbled by her story. I turned 60 a couple of months before. It wasn’t an exciting birthday. I was trying to rebuild my life after an eviction, job (and friend) loss, and overcoming cataract surgery. I thought I had it bad UNTIL I heard her story.

Can I give you a compliment? I asked.

Sure! she said.

Thank you for being an inspiration to me and to others. Your story told me a lot about overcoming life’s speed bumps. You’ve done it in a very quiet and respectful way!

She burst into tears.

How can you say that? How am I an inspiration?

I told her that many times we silently go through things that have us feeling lost and overwhelmed. Without a “testimony” we think we’re the only one UNTIL we hear about the struggle/success of someone who’s had it worse. In addition, I told her that her story was a PRIME example of moving forward with a greater appreciation of what GOD has in store for ALL of us.  As I spoke, I cried too. That in turn made her, and the leasing agent also cry. I hadn’t really intended on throwing this lady a curve. It just happened.

Validation is important. It needs to be done consistently and purposely. You never know what someone is going through, until you hear their story. In my case, I needed to hear Diane’s story. Her story gave me momentum. I needed to move forward with my life. In hearing her story, I validated her by saying Thank you. You changed my life!
Validation = Changing someone’s life!

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Focus: Validation, spirit, life purpose, inspiration

Question for You: 1) How can your life story inspire others? 2) Who can you share it with?

Tuesday, May 16, 2017

5 Ways To Stop Bad Listening Habits

Here are 5 ways to stop bad listening habits:

  1. Catch yourself in the act. By monitoring your listening behavior, you can catch yourself when you fall into an undesirable behavior.
  2. Fight the habit. Don't wait until tomorrow to change. Admit your behavior when you catch yourself.
  3. Substitute an old habit with a new one. Learn what isn't working for you. Learn the value of your new behavior and trust in yourself.
  4. Brag about your success. When you have done something well, celebrate it. Give yourself a pat on the back.
  5. Be patient. Give yourself a break. You will make mistakes. You will improve gradually.
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Tuesday, May 9, 2017

A Good Idea (About Blogs)

A Good Idea
A professional blog is a great way to show your expertise. What do you “know” better than anyone else? Put that knowledge to “work” for you. The blog doesn’t need to be extensive (just informative). It can be a weekly entry that informs people. Take it a step further by listing it through a search engine like Google or Yahoo (FREE ADVERTISING) > take advantage of an ADSENSE program by featuring ads on your blog. Every time someone visits your blog and clicks on a sponsored ad, you earn $$$$.
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Wednesday, May 3, 2017

5 Tips To Get Over Fear of Speaking in Public

Did you know that people would rather die, than to get up in front of people, and speak? That’s right. What many don’t know is that getting up in front of a group of people is not that hard. It just takes practice and patience.
Public peaking is more than just a large hall, a stage and a podium. Formal and informal events comprise public speaking. Remember this: Public speaking is your ability to inform or persuade an audience, even if it’s an audience of one!
Here are 5 tips to help you be successful:
1.    Have a purpose, make sure your audience knows why you are there and what you are going to talk about. Repeat your “purpose” as needed.
2.    Organize your topics. Your ideas have to stay connected and flow.Think of your presentation as an “hourglass.” Begin with something general and narrow it down with examples. End your presentation by restating your purpose or with a story that leaves your audience thinking and wanting more.
3.    Support your points with facts. Prove each of your points with examples. Use personal stories if necessary.
4.    Watch your voice. Your voice tells your story. Remember how you loved hearing stories from your parents? They used their voice to express the characters. Well, you need to do the same. You are on a stage and you are giving a performance! Monotonous or sloppy speech won’t express your passion. You can have perfect posture and a great wardrobe, but if your speaking voice is weak, your audience will notice. Professionals, and your friends, can advise you.
5.    Be interesting. Your audience will forgive almost anything, but BOREDOM. Your job is to be memorable. That is where you generate your credibility.

Every time you speak, you have a chance to practice, inform and persuade and shape how people perceive you. Every time you speak, you’ll gain confidence and that builds rapport with business contacts. Remember, your audience wants you to succeed. They are on your side! 
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