Saturday, October 29, 2016

Bad Habits


Bad habits die hard. We know when we’ve done something (i.e. smoking, over eating) that isn’t good for us. That “still small voice” gets our attention. We can’t ignore what it’s saying. Before changing any behaviors, it’s helpful to know why you want to get rid of it. If you change the habit, what will be your pay back? Are you ready for something better?

When you begin the “path to betterment”, you’ll hear the whispers of encouragement. And, it WILL BE REFRESHING!

Too often, we’re unaware of the ways we rob ourselves of the precious moments that could be spent nurturing our creativity.

As long as you continue to cling to bad habits that aren’t life enhancing, you steal from your potential.

Just 1 Page . . .


Words: potential, creativity, habits.

Saturday, October 22, 2016

Our Patterns


There is a great lesson to be learned from the story about the loaves and fishes in the Bible. As the story goes, Jesus was teaching to thousands. It came time to eat. The only food available was 5 loaves and 2 fishes. Jesus multiplied it and fed everyone. A while later, the apostles experienced another need for a miracle. They went to Jesus and asked him for help. He brought up that they had little faith. The apostles were repeatedly taught by a MASTER, yet they weren’t learning the lesson. It’s because their consciousness about lack and abundance, wasn’t fully developed. They hadn’t learned the lesson.

What patterns or lessons are you currently facing? They could be issues with diet, exercise, finances etc. Whatever the issue, you can’t move OUT of it until you learn it. And learning “it” means you know the lesson so well that you won’t move forward when it comes back.

Open your eyes to the patterns that trap you. Address each pattern one at a time. Make a commitment to learn from them so that they don’t repeat themselves.
And, if you’re stuck, get quiet and ask spirit to speak to you in a still small voice.

Watch what happens.

Just 1 Page . . .


Words: Confidence, consciousness, miracles

Sunday, October 16, 2016

Worry: Thief Of Time

When you worry, you think  you’re doing something positive. You think if you worry enough, you’ll come up with a better “game plan.”

If you fall into a worry pattern, stop! Think about what’s going right. You might have to write it down or say it out loud. Sometimes, it takes a while to change the “negative channel.” You might even have to ask Spirit for a “circumstance blessing,” or “Amazing Grace.”

One of the reasons we worry is that we feel powerless over our circumstances.

Try to observe how much worrying you do. Identify the issues that cause you frustration and/or grief.

Tackle them one at a time.

Bring back your joy!

You deserve it!

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Words: Grace, perspective, worry, spirit

Monday, October 10, 2016

Tithing

I believe that tithing is a spiritual and God-like principle. The Bible says it’s important to tithe 1/10 of what you earn on a month-to-month basis. It took me a while to understand that when I tithe, I’m trusting God for more. God created the world and there is an abundant source available to us. If he created the world, he’ll create “out of the blue” income when we/you need it.

Spiritual law tells us that as we give, we shall also receive. Money is a form of energy. Energy does not increase if it’s hoarded.

Tithing allows us to express our thanksgiving for what we have.

Money will cease to be an issue when you relax about it. Tithe and see how things change.

Just 1 Page . . .


Words: Thanksgiving, tithing, spirit

Monday, October 3, 2016

Confrontations

 Right up with public speaking, people avoid confrontations. While I don’t like to do it, I’ve had to, to preserve my mental health. For me, purging is something I believe in. Maybe, it is the reminder of the thousands of dollars I spent on therapy. I was raised in an oppressive environment where “children should be seen and not heard.” When you live in a family where your voice isn’t heard, it builds up a lot of anger and anxiety. While I’ve had to confront a lot of people, the hardest person to confront was my mom. Since I’m the first born (and only ) boy in the family; and because my dad wasn’t the best husband, my mom used me as her  husband/lover substitute. Now, I’m not talking about incest here, I’m referring to how sometimes a parent inadvertently uses a child for what should be a “parent responsibility.” It was only after my father died; and I entered counseling, did I realize the unhealthy dynamic my mom created in using me in the way she did.

Years ago, I didn’t want to cause any problems with my mom. Although, our relationship was dysfunctional, I saw my mom as “my world.” If she loved me, that was enough. When you look around and start to challenge ingrained family patterns, you learn that those type of beliefs need to change. As I grew stronger in counseling, I took steps to “talk” to her. I use the word talk  for a reason. Initially, we did talk calmly. I brought things to her attention that bothered me. I took pride in changing my oppressiveness. Alas, my mom  didn’t listen to my viewpoints. She was still disrespecting me and wanted things her way. This type of behavior grows old quickly, especially when you want a positive change in your relationships.

Each time, I took a step to talk,  I was ignored. Eventually, I recognized that talking to a person who is unwilling to listen and change, doesn’t require more energy. I eventually let go of my mom. While our relationship was close when I was younger, it broke into a million pieces, never to be restored. If she were willing to listen to my concerns and make observable changes, our relationship would’ve have been a healthier one.

My mom taught me a lot about confrontations. The built up anger and anxiety took a toll on me emotionally, psychologically and spiritually. Now, when something isn’t going well with any of my relationships, I step back and do an inventory on what isn’t working. I then formulate and rehearse a “practice speech,” to make sure I’m addressing the issue(s) and not putting the other person on the defensive. Does this work for me? In theory, it sounds great; especially when your intention is to clear the air and keep the friendship/relationship healthy. You can only do your part and trust that the other person is empathetic and respectful  enough to work with you. Within the last couple of years, I’ve had to do a number of confrontations. Was I fearful? You bet! Was my intention of healing and discussing the issues a pure one? Absolutely. Did they pan out like I wanted? No!

Just recently, I had to confront two friends who were clueless to give and take in a relationship. When I confronted both of them, they looked at me as if I was talking to them in Russian. They didn’t have the skills to change their behaviors. I’ve seen each of them at my local health club. When I greet them with a “Good morning,” they give me a silent stare and nothing else. In some situations, they avoid the locker room altogether until I leave. These behaviors show the smallness and insecurity of who they are. In this case, these 2 ex-friends showed a pattern similar to my mom.

In the words of Iyanla Vanzant, “When stupid’s coming, cross the street.” It’s so much easier on me when I see stupid behavior coming (that can’t be changed), I cross the street.

Question for you: What confrontational behaviors are you currently ignoring rather than addressing? (i.e. cheating lovers, verbal abuse etc.) How much longer will you “settle” before you confront and “cross the street?”
Focus: family, spirit, health, wellness